The other day I was drink at work with Michelle a mate a work I shout her a drinks because it was her birthday so then on wed she did a shift for me in the kitchen and after work we went to fat eddies to a burlesque night were boyfriend was and after a bit he square up to me asking had  I be trying to chat her up which for once was not the case me with my bottle in hand waiting for a drunken punch to come my way it did not in the end he saw reason and said sorry anyway the bar maid was really nice and it turn out that I know her brother so watch this place anyway Michelle and her little man left with her I carry on drinking then we went to a bar got in a lock in got so drunk I cannot remember if I pissed of any one or the bar maid hope not so I end up walking to mc ds I so drunk I could not read the order bored got home rang the polish but I cannot remember what is spoke about.

The next morning I had to go to work on my day of because I had to interview someone with waz for a chef position anyway that done we got a call from Mick “my exitif chef”  tell us that he had a chef to cove us when we go to dunedon so that going to fun

So I not been up to much really just work work work no crazy shit at all.  so the head chef has left and was and I have been put in joint charge of the kitchen so I am now head chef of the bog and the owner max what’s me and was to go to Dunedin to fix his bar down there sound like fun

I am going out tonight with Mr. d and gorge I have not done not been up to anything crazy in a long time so tonight is the night

It was not that crazy but have learned that kiwi love Pink Floyd and I do not share the same view ended at the bar on Avon shouting at Germans about the football and nearly got in a fight but I had gorge there to back me up

I have a piece of advice 4 any one reading this blog problem the best thing bit on advice ever on this blog If you are having sleepless night and you are all alone in a cold flat and no cuddly bud in sight do not turn on your PC and start listening to nick cave & the bad seeds in per tickly to murder ballads the kindness of strangers it really is one crazy man and will not help you fall in to a deep sleep well not me

Jayme keep text point less text i think she is nut’s witch just make’s her more sexy that fun. So did not meet with cinnamon on thru sham but she meet me after work on fir with her mate’s  it went well I think till I went to hug her when I was leaving and she yelp that a side I had to get up at 6.00am to watch the England game so I drag myself in to the bog to watch it because I do not have a TV in my house want a waste of time f&^*ING S%$* anyway start work after watching the game all good waz’er was back I can chill out now and on mon it was the quiz night my chance to say hello to cinnamon she was there and thing’s went ok I think I try to hard she left after the quiz had finshed so me and waz  got really drunk and meet a French man (fun) it was he’s birthday we shout him food and drink he was all by hem self my good deed for day done I staged home with waz. well tuse came and the head chef inform us that he is leaving now sham he has really started to work hard and better in the last week well tuse came it was the turn of the all Wight to strut their stuff waz want to stay out but he had no money after his holiday so like any good mate would do I shout hem a night well what a night we got so drunk but before the game started who walk throw the door cinnamon with the man that host the quiz on a mon night she did not ever come say hello a wave that was all o well

The fun thing happened before I left for town my landlord can round I was in the shower and had to jump out with towel round my west hair wet I open the door forgetting I had my pink sleeper on and in my room my Perl necklace less was on display and as was velvet gloves now I am think my landlord thinks I gay

 I have spent more time in the dentists over here I cannot understand why I come half why across the world and I have to spent my f&^*ing money in dentists. Tow ladies from the quiz on a Mon invited me to this party on sat I am working sun all day but I think I might go just to say hello and stack my clam on cinnamon she is a really cute lady and I should not say  it in this way. I have not had a drink for 7 days apart from tasting my cheese cake which had butter scot and baileys in it but tonight I am going out with Mr. d I think Mr. Andy coming it a thus night so sure it cannot get to crazy J

It was not I sat there drinking OJ all night then fir came finished work well early so I gave Mr. d a call he was at the pub so I went down and we went to merval witch is the hot spot for picking up the older ladies now we all know I am a little purshaly to the older lady but all it was beer and some really good food but no lady’s

Sat came work was s*&^ went to jazzman (I her name is Amy) it was her party 21^st and cinnamon was there and this is one I like so the party was ok I was there for about 10mins but anufh to make an impression but this little boy try to make me look small by saying bet you can cook chip’s all I look at him and said listen her you little fuck I am a trained chef not small strict of piss like you

On Mon cinnamon and jazzman were at the quiz and after work I start to talk to cinnamon and I now meeting her on thus not sure if it date or not we will see and maybe find out her name too

Tues. had a couple after work then end up at Mickey fin’s now this is where it turns’ bad the Irish boy’s 4t it would be funny to make me drink guineas it was not sick on the road and fill like shit all day

So the joy division thing was pretty average Andy left early so I went in pursuit of this new lady got to the gig at the honey pot she was there with her boy friend and I not going to get on a high house because I know that I am a f^%$ James but I can relies and no this but this lady was fritting with me the other week and not once did she said anything about her bf THE DRUMER IN THE BAND o wop d fucking do. I am really thing about turning A sexually is would stop me from doing the thing I am doing and making a dick out of myself away I went home early because I was not really in the mood to entrain. The band were not too bad fun. sun came and went with nothing to shout about apart from saying I was not going to drink for a mouth with lasted about 4 hour’s then after work 1 beer at les it was just one. then mon came and I thing I have a couple of lady that do the quiz on a mon that fancy me well at les one of them nose I thing I do not know there name’s thy told me that y are jazzmen and cinnamon 18 I think do not know if I want to go down that road again so after a couple after work on mon I went to see my good friend waz a say bye bye before he goes to ven-a-wer-to. He 4t it was a good idea to put vodka in my cider it was not cos at 4 in the morning went it was in my toilet basin and I was feeling like death, anyway at waz he’s mate were there and I had great pleaser in tell them all about my tiny dick thy 4t this was funny I do not one bit I was so drunk then I had to drag myself in to work I repeat for all mate’s sprit’s are a no no for the jettea so wed day off and what did I do f^&^ all just sit in bed o what a great life I am caving for myself in NZ

So weekend meet up with Mr. XT Andy farmer had few drink’s after work then bump in to gorge at good bye blue Monday no sign of Jayme thank god and got cooled some serial killer by some little boys and Jessie a friend of gorge 4t that is was not right and 4t he would square up to them and tell them if they did not say sorry he would kick the fucking shit out of them so they said sorry and left. then we went to a pub were gorge done all the wiring for the light (there I a lot of light’s) and I meet this dread locks lady hippie and I got in to a conversation with her about self settable life style and I just said “do not give me any of your hippie bull shit about how we can all have a self settable life style” and not that I believe that is not possible In some sort of way but I tort it be fun to play devil argot so I just shout what you going to do went you break your leg went you are trying to install you fuck solar panes I do not think she agreed with me but I think Do not think she slap me or came home with me all I had when I work up in the morning was a cold corned blur next to me

So mon came had a few drink’s after work then on the way home I bum in to a mate and she was leaving the next day to go to auz so she was have a party so I went with her to house and one or to bottle of cider then work up feeling like hell and of to work with my incompetent head chef I mean I no I am no Gordon Ramsey but I can make fucking instated gravy and so can the fucking ho bow on the street as 4 “head chef” this seam to very hard task to complete but he is the most nice man ever

So tuse came Andy farmer leaving drink’s (bye bye MR X-T the will not be the same amore) I meet this great lady who is studying speech and physic’s so she is really intelligent and o my god she is so sexy to I going to have to find her think she will be at this gig on sat she is a Vega and this is how I got talking to her she had my Vega special and said it was one of the best she had in new Zealand and then it turns out  that her mate is related to the captain of the craft gild chef for the new Zealand Olympic curly team and her mate is going give my number to the captain so with a bit of luck  she will give my number to the captain and I can be a treated  and become part of the new Zealand curly team sorry UK

Bonnie arrived on thru after sweet talking the driver to drop her of at the bog and pick her up again and drop her of at mine well I finish work early at meet bonnie at an anther Irish bar got my key’s and can home had I a shower and went back to meet bon so we hit the town it was one crazy night here there and every were we end up at an after party in cartel were we meet the owner do not know what time we go home but I do know that I mange to burn a pizza but I did show bonnie the joy and greatness of chicken corn de blur I think she hock as well going have to send them over in bulk to auz for her on sat so we went for a pizza and then MR Williams called he came round and was my pad I like it but is might have had something to do with drinking for 4 in the afternoon anyway we went out for beer after the Williams retired home and me and bon were still recovering from thus so we went home and she had to be up at 4 so we went home and crash out but I had to get up at 4 to carry her bag down stair’s it was blooded heavy any I went back to sleep going out with Andy to some joy division tribute thing tonight there is a high chance Jayme going hope not

I really think I have to stop this joke of my life I moved my life right throw a dig a hole in goggle maps and end up in Christchurch doing the same thing as I was in London drinking and making a fucking dick of myself and leaving a trail of lady’s that I fall for and then somehow manage to fuck it up. anyway Andy farmer last shift last night so me and waz finish work went back to his place and had a couple of ciders well a bottle each to be truthful  and then went back to the bog to collect Andy I think we piss of Andy it was closed we help Andy close up I say help I do not think we were that much help I spelt a varce with water in it all over the bar he had just cleaned and then not to sound gay me and waz were casing each over all over the bar with tea towis wiping each, then to the Mickey of fin’s I had one drink and I was over it pissed as a drunk on the street  well all left to complete a 24 mission chicken cordon blur that is becoming a rotten with me and waz drink,24, cordon blur, home but this time waz was really nice and cooked us all pie’s really nice pie and they were hot this time because the night before he did the same for me and hem but they were still frozen in the middle but we ate them anyway

So may 5 I moved in to my new flat it is great but the lady down stairs, I no she is a lady because I saw her hanging out her washing out of my window at my old flat window she be playing her music really loud so I went out and got a two speaker base box system two level up thing up and play NOFX as loud as I could it seems to be working it is cutting her music out. anyway back to the flat my kitchen  window is opposite my old room window at cher crazy and my stocker from there has taken my old room so if she look out of the window in my old room she might catch a little gleam’s of my sweet six pack again. I love the fact that I can make a cup of rose lee when I want not between the hour’s of 9 to 9.30 work is going a bit crazy I think the head chef might be being demoted I hope not he is a really nice man but waz is gust two much of a good chef and I am now the sor chef which is a bit of a jock because waz is so much better than me but he has no interests in the sor chef role  but I think if the head chef role comes up there no way am tacking it I hope that waz will take it time will tell.  by the time I had finish righting this she had turn down her music. The lady down stairs woke me up with joy division today at 8.50am I do not mind that might have to pop down and say how you doing hope it is a lady